I have been creating art for as long as I can remember. Over the course of my adult life I have explored endless processes and media. I am aware that I have a tendency to reach for the next shiny thing, like a magpie! I love the thrill of finding a new way of working, a new media or tool. This approach has served me well., and has provided endless enjoyment and fulfillment, a wealth of experiences. The research I have done and knowledge I have gained not only informs my own work but has been, and continues to be invaluable to my students. I am honoured to be known as the go-to person when a techy question arises and I’m always happy to respond.
Recently I have been doing a lot of reflecting about where I am now with my work and where I would like to be. Much of this introspection has come about from Cheryl Taves’ excellent online course The Artists Mindset that I started last Autumn and I am still working through! I know I am easily bored, and at the point I feel I have mastered a way of working I am off to find something else. I am slowly uncovering reasons why that should be but the result is I’m aware I have missed points on this journey where I should have lingered longer, should have dug a little deeper. Rich seams have been left un-mined. Of course hindsight is a marvelous thing and who knows where we would be if we made different choices But the ‘sliding door’ doesn’t exist, we are where we are and are the product of that journey. I wouldn’t change the last 45 years for anything, I love what I do and the knowledge I have attained, but it is worth looking back to move forwards.
We bought our first Spanish house in a small pueblo blanco back in 2006, initially it was just a holiday retreat from the grey English winters but it became much more than that. Two years later we had bought a 300 year old ruin that we renovated and by 2010 I had a large studio. At the time we started our adventure in Spain I was still very much a printmaker, one constant has been my subject matter; the urban environment. I decided to explore my new environment, and at the same time break free from what I felt at the time were restraints in printmaking. I decided to explore collage and embarked on a series of works on paper and canvas using the shapes, colours and textures of Andalucia. I had been researching one of my artist hero’s Ron Pokrasso (below) and wanted to create work that was as interesting and liberating as his.
I remember at the time it felt scary but exciting. I was very much out of my comfort zone! I had established myself as a printmaker of city scenes and this was pushing boundaries of both printmaking and subject matter. That summer I exhibited them and most of them sold. Deep down whilst I enjoyed the process, I wasn’t happy with them but couldn’t work out why.

At the time I wasn’t aware of many artists who worked with printmaking and collage in this way and felt I was in uncharted territory. Whilst breaking ground is exciting, it’s also scary, and I simply wasn’t brave enough to forge ahead. Steven Pressfield in his book The War of Art argues that “the more important a call or action is to our souls evolution, the more resistance we will feel toward pursuing it”. Those points at which we are the most resistant can signify a moment of breakthrough. Resistance was there in bucket loads, but back then I was unaware of the strength resistance has.

Fast forward 14 years and I have been on a fabulous journey through collagraphy, mark making, acrylics, oil paint and much, much more. I and am far braver than I was then and I have achieved a huge amount on many levels.Taking my MA led me to explore many more avenues, theorists and approaches. I can also recognise that back in 2009 I was far more concerned about pleasing an audience. I was drawn towards landscape not on because of my time in Spain, but also because landscape is probably the most popular genre! I suspect I was also working to a formula; each collage had a tree or two, and I distinctly remember thinking ‘I like this one without a tree’ but felt without it it would be too abstract, too edgy, too difficult to sell.

 

 

Studying these works now from the distance of time I can see many echoes that have travelled with me through the years. The building of layers, the textures of wood and stone, the browns and ochres. I can also see a strong interest in shape, in particular the irregular shape of the collages as they spill out of the rectangle. They remind me of the tetra pack prints I made for my MA, the collages I regularly do in my sketchbook, and the prints I was doing last year from Karen Stampers cardboard. This visual language is my voice, it’s authentic to me and I can see how it has travelled with me, and nurtured my art over the years. My past self was was relying too much on the validation of others.

It is clear now looking back that whilst the process was exciting and interesting the subject matter was all wrong. I’m not a landscape artist. I love being out in the wild open places but other than occasional forays into geology it doesn’t feed into my work. I am a product of my upbringing; a flat without a garden in South London. We would have occasional trips to the South Downs or Brighton but other than that wide open spaces are not in my DNA, neither are trees, plants or flowers. Give me rust, concrete and signage anytime!

I can see clearly what I want to revisit and what I want to leave in the past. I’m excited to see where revisiting this process but with a more authentic head on my shoulders and the wealth of knowledge I have inside it will lead me! Cheryl’s TAM has taught me the value in slowing down, to take the time to acknowledge and make note of those moments of joy, and to hold an intention that allows me to narrow my focus and dig deeper.

This month I have been back to Spain but in a busy town. My focus is firmly on the urban, on collage and printmaking. I am taking the time to reflect as I go and only have an audience of one in mind….myself!

*If you want to immerse yourself in the urban through mixed media head to my URBAN EXPLORATIONS course, it only runs once a year.